Connecting with One’s Own Sexuality

One of the most frequent issues I’ve dealt with throughout my career as a sex therapist is self- image. I’ve heard comments such as: I don’t feel attractive; I’m just not that into myself right now etc... It is common that one may lose sight of one’s self-worth or simply lose sight of one’s own reflection in the mirror. Often then none, this causes disruptions in one’s sexual life and might affect the other partner if one is in a relationship. This is to say that one’s self esteem highly impacts ones sexuality. Our subconscious being is in constant communication with the image we are projecting onto the world and onto ourselves. The subconscious is as deep as it is concerned with basic questions such as: “do I like myself?”, “Do I find myself attractive?” We must also receive that kind of approbation from the outside world, that kind of basic approval so we may feel that sense of self-worth.

How does our self-esteem affect our sexuality? First let’s talk about decisions! What is it that you truly want? What is it that you truly don’t? Both as important to ask. A low self-esteem could result in one thinking that they perhaps have nothing else to offer besides their sexuality and sex for the wrong reasons could lead to unfortunate outcomes. Let alone regret. This is why taking affirmative decisions, such as whom you’d like to be with, when and under what circumstance is an empowering element to nurturing one’s own sexuality. Sometimes, it takes experience to get to know oneself but so be it. Do not judge whatever situation got you to your next step, the one in which you learnt something that got you closer to yourself. Being clear with ones desires is not a play on power or a defiance of any sort. It’s merely following that which suits you most. One may choose to be loud or completely discreet about it. That is also a personal choice.

How do I build the confidence to make these decisions? Well there are simple tricks! Simple solutions! First of all, if you simply can’t! if you are stubborn in not knowing what it takes!.... then you must try faking it. Faking what? Confidence. That is one word for it but really I meant to say little exercises to build it up. Making oneself up, taking care of oneself, grooming, taking time to properly shower, cream, make one’s hair, facials, nails, for men and women alike, is ESSENTIAL! Out of a 100 you’ve already for 50 right in your back pocket if one takes the time of day to get done up and look pretty according to your own taste. It doesn’t hurt either to transform one’s own environment into a space into one that reflects your truest self, a place you can just be surrounded with whatever reflects you. This atmosphere will raise your vibration.

Next is one own accomplishments, the major confidence builder. Do what will make you feel proud of yourself. What is it that you did to change you in the world, the world in you, a lot or just a little today? Maybe you decidedly did nothing and that may be your accomplishment. There is nothing more important than the other as long as it resonates with your true vertical and your connection with source.

Lastly, I would advise a modification in poster. Whenever you remember or need a boost, stand up right, uncross your arms, raise them wide left and right as if you were going to hug the wind, lift your chin, think of a moment you felt SO GOOD in your life, and multiply, multiply, multiply. Good energy echoes outwards and increases very rapidly with this simple manoeuver.

Are you looking for guidance on how to boost your self-esteem and become the sexiest version of yourself? You can talk to a trusted & verified psychic mastermind on Avid Advice, the leading community of celebrity psychics and intuitive readers. Sign up for 5 Free Minutes toward your first conversation with ANY psychic of your choice!

Do not let the media dictate what is sexy and what isn’t. The media plays such a pivotal role in our self-image. It seems to tell us what is hot and what is not. Well, the reality is much different. When one comes face to face with our own sexual selves or face to face with a partner, the elements that heighten the energy are completely devout of any image we’ve seen on a billboard. When one expresses one’s inner most nature, unencumbered with how they should look like, but trusting that one’s inner most self is in full expression, that’s when the experience is raised to a higher level and the element of freedom comes forth to play. What is sexy is whatever you make it to be. There is no designing one’s sexiness. It is actually a force that surrounds you, a vibe that emanates from within you that you can’t even see but that other can pick up on. So there is no use forcing it. You are sexy whether you try or not.